Stories from “Cabin” by Louis Marvin
The Attack of the Mad Ax Man
“Watch the attack of the mad ax man”
—Michael Schenker Group
He sat in his lawn chair, in front of his cabin, with birds singing and wind whispering the needles of his pines. He had on boots, Levi’s and a lumberjack shirt. He had one leg straight, and one bent and under the chair. He held his ax in his hands.
The smaller trees were calling him again. Those bullies of great stature needed to be taken down a notch and give the small trees and shrubs a chance to catch the sun and for them to grow too.
He was some sort of mad reverse botanist, a bringer of ax and lightning. An example of how the woods can talk to man a little too much. Not what Thoreau had in mind.
"nd 119" (photo by Flickr user Travis K)
“Please help us grow. These bully trees take all the sunshine. Just because we are the wrong type, or color, or height or don’t have flowers to beautify the woods, the bully trees take away our sunshine, sunshine.”
He heard their calls and got up with his ax and bare hands to open up the sky. I can’t save you all, but like the man who throws a hundred starfish back to the ocean when 10,000 have washed up, I can make a difference.
He walked into the woods, and the voices came from every little bush, sapling tree, vine and moss. “Save us, save us, save us, save us.”
Thwack, into a great large base he cut. And blood-like sap flowed onto his ax and into the ground, and down the the bottom and roots. Thwack, he went with sharpened precision into the meat of the bully tree. It took his slices and dices with a stance that said, “Fuck you, little lumberjack.” Thwack you, too.
When he felled the trees, he never took into account that he was crushing others along the way that were in the giant’s path. For those that were to see the light, it was a great deed. For those that were killed, like the big tree and the saplings in the path of the felled giant, it was murder.
But he cut on. And the big tree fell. In a crushing crash of tangled branches and vines and bush, it hit the forest floor and bounced and shook hundred year-old dust into the air.
He sat on the tree like a knight who has felled a dragon. A human-eating machine who spews fire and poison and is a genuine menace to society. He sat on a tree, like it was a mass murderer given lethal injection. What took a hundred years to grow took him minutes to fell. He wiped his brow with a handkerchief.
Evil, Eager Beaver
As soon as Mr. Soo heard the crash, he knew Carl had dropped another one of his trees. It was never on Carl’s land. It was rarely on any other’s land. It was always him that had his trees felled by the great evil beaver, Carl. Only his little trees and bushes called out to be saved.
"Beaver" (photo by Flickr user Brett)
“Oh, that goddamn Carl. I know it was you again. Fuck!”
He had to calm down. It was always something with these backwoods Arizona folks. Poaching, cutting down trees, teenage beer parties. His land must have had a sign that said “Do Your Worst” on it.
He went into his cabin to call the sheriff.
“Hi Billy, it’s Mr. Soo. I just heard a big crash out there. I know it’s a tree of mine.”
“John, don’t you go out there. It’s only me at the phone here. Terry is getting coffee and some breakfast. I’ll have him stop by and get you first. But don’t you go out there. You know if it’s Carl he’s got the ax and saws and he’s not right.”
“I’ll wait.”
He held back the curtain and looked out into the woods. He sighed and sat down in his favorite chair and took a sip of tea.
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Louis Marvin is living the dream life in Honolulu with his Chinese girls. Born in Burbank, raised in Arizona, dreaming in Hawaii. Visit http://louismarvinlives.webs.
