Sexy Questions for a New You!

With a new year comes New Year’s Resolutions. But before you can actually create effective resolutions, you have to start with some soul-searching questions. Thus we bring you Sexy Questions For A New You, a few items to ponder on your own or with friends as 2009 begins to unfold.

1. Should you date/marry someone if you find their sister/brother more attractive?

2. Even if everyone was reasonably satisfied in their sexual relationships, would this bring an end to prostitution?

3. Despite what our mothers may have told us, does meaningful casual sex exist?

4. How old were you when you realized prostitutes aren’t really as hot as you used to imagine they were?

Wouldn't you like a Sugar Daddy, baby? (photo: buycostumes.com)

5. Is having a sugar daddy better or worse then shacking up? Would you rather have someone who pays all your rent some of the time or half your rent all the time?

6. If an activity that takes two people is sexual for one person, is it necessarily sexual for the other person?

7. How long should you wait to date/shag a best friend’s ex? Or: should you ever date/shag a best friend’s ex?

8. A scenario:

ME: Let’s hook up!
SHE: I’m old enough to be your mom!
ME: I know!

Is this wrong?

9. Can you ever forget the name of someone you’ve had hot sex with?

10. Is the world prepared for grandmothers with breasts implants?

11. If, like the study says, women are naturally bisexual, then why can’t I find two women who’d be into a threesome for next weekend?

12. Apparently half of all straight people occasionally experience bisexual fantasies. Why is that? Perhaps the answer to this matrix is Keanu Reeves. Come on guys, I know you think he’s hot!

13. Does anyone else think it’s interesting that the timeless rule of how much younger a person you should date (i.e. half your age plus 7) means that no one under the age of 14 could legally have sex? 14 divided by 2 equals 7 plus 7 equals 14. Now try someone younger, say 12 divided by 2 equals 6 plus 7 equals 13. Okay now a 13 year old, 13 divided by 2 equals 6.5 plus 7 equals 13.5. Essentially according to the rule a 13 year old can’t have sex with a 12 year old so by default a 12 year old can’t have sex with anyone.

14/2=7+7=14
16/2=8+7=15
18/2=9+7=16
20/2=10+7=17
22/2=11+7=18
80/2=40+7=47

Claudia Schiffer never fakes orgasm (photo: javno.com)

14. If your partner surprised you by telling you she won the Best Fake Orgasm award as an amateur sex actor, would you be happy for her?

15. Were locker rooms and away-game road-trips invented by someone who thought teenage gay sex was a solution to teenage pregnancy?

16. Admit it: even you are starting to think Madonna is getting old. Come to think of it, when was the last time you thought of her as sexy?

Out of the box harness: sexy or scary? (photo: AskTheGeek.com)

17. If, by some strange accident, you (a male) found a strap-on dildo and harness (not in their original packaging) in your new girlfriend’s apartment, would you be excited, scared, curious or disappointed? And how long would you wait to tell her, if ever?

18. If, by another strange accident, you (a female) found only gay porn in your new boyfriend’s apartment, after you’d decided he was the perfect guy, what would you say to yourself?

A) I knew it! All the good ones are gay!
B) This is something we can work around.
C) Cool!
D) I wonder if I can repress this?

19. What would your response be if a girl you found really really attractive came up to you in a bar and said, “I will go home with you as long as you understand it is one night only and you don’t ask for my number or have any delusions of seeing me again”?

20. If there was a 100% safe and effective way to shorten the length of a male penis, how many men do you think would jump at the chance?

21. How long do you think it has been since a married couple has had sex in the White House?

22. How long do you think it has been since the President has gotten a blowjob in the Oval Office?

23. Was the response to #21 longer or shorter than the response to #22, and why?

24. Admit it: if Hillary Clinton is really a lesbian, you would be dying to know who she’s sleeping with.

25. Admit it: right now you are thinking to yourself that just maybe Hillary Clinton would have been a better choice. Oh no? Well, let me just ask you this: if you need someone to clean house, how often would you choose a man over a woman?

26. Why do so many women seem to love the new TV show Dexter, about a good-guy serial killer? And is anyone surprised to find out the main character is dating his sister on the show in real life?

27. Which medical drama has the sexiest characters: ER, Grey’s Anatomy, Scrubs or House? And which of these shows feature the doctors with the highest IQs?

28. Is there any correlation for you, personally, between IQ and sex appeal?

29. Isn’t it hard to believe that men don’t exercise more when you find out that losing weight can actually add length to your penis?

30. Wouldn’t the world would be just a little better off if all the people who have had three or more marriages would just hook up with the people who can’t seem to find anyone to marry for the first time? It’d be a perfect match, where the desperate meet the needy! Remember this next time you’re browsing the personals.