Selling Yourself is Easy (Part 5 of 6)

Photo courtesy of Joy Toyz

Selling yourself isn’t as easy as it used to be. According to Belladonna’s MySpace profile (you might know her from such favourites as “The Fashionistas” and “Fetish Fanatic, Chapter 4″), “You must love anal sex with other girls” to be considered for a role in one of her productions.

Must I?

And this brings me to glass dildos.

Glass dildos have been a secret obsession of mine for a few reasons:

1. They are glass and therefore knick-knacks.

2. They are knick-knacks one can insert into one’s vagina.

3. They are often made of Pyrex.

I do not own a glass dildo.

I, in fact, own only two adult novelties. I have a leather paddle for personal use, and a “Pocket Rocket” that was just left in my apartment one evening.

And this brings me to masturbation.

I don’t own toys because I am of firm mind that the hand does suffice. But I rarely masturbate. Now, you may ask, how does a healthy, multi-orgasmic girl like me “rarely masturbate?”

Masturbation isn’t as easy as it used to be, apparently. According to my wacky brain (you might know it from such favourites as “Selling Yourself Is Easy” parts I-IV) and my wanton cunt, “You must love anal sex with other girls” to be considered for a session of good, old-fashioned bean-flickery.

To summarize: I can no longer please myself sexually, and it’s three orifices or bust.